Friday’s Gluttony

Friday’s Feast is still silent, but Suna more-or-less (more less than more but nonetheless) tagged me with a meme. I usually don’t like to answer lists this long, but…

1. Were you named after anyone?
Yes, I’m a junior. [See, Suna! I’m trying to do better with these silly binary questions.]
2. When was the last time you cried?
I remember crying, but I don’t remember when. I seem not to hold onto negative data like that. It’s just too easy to flush the buffers.
3. Do you like your handwriting?
It depends on whether or not I’m trying to read it. I often get compliments on how pretty my handwriting is—usually followed by questions about which writing system I use.


Liverwurst on toast with onion, cheese, and mayo—yum!

Photo source: Guy Albertelli

4. What is your favorite lunch meat?
Liverwurst followed closely by Salsalito Turkey.
5. Do you have kids?
Yes, but I have sired none. My bit for population control. All problems facing humanity today can be seen to stem from overpopulation.
6. If you were another person would you be friends with you?
Probably. “I think I’m an alright guy,” as the Todd Snider song goes.
7. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
Not a lot. I have trouble recognizing it, so I try to avoid it. But it does creep into my communication style.
8. Do you still have your tonsils?
No.


Some creatures are made for bungee jumping. Humans aren’t

Photo source: funadium

9. Would you bungee jump?
That would be a “Hell, no!” I wouldn’t even get close enough to the edge to be pushed.
10. What is your favorite cereal?
Honey Nut Cheerios
11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Sometimes—especially if they won’t come off otherwise.
12. Do you think you are strong?
There are many measures of strength. Everyone is strong just as everyone is weak.
13. What is your favorite ice cream?
The flavor in front of me.
14. What is the first thing you notice about people?
Different things with different people. Just say their comportment.
15. Red or pink?
On what?


I notice different things first on different people, but some always seem to be wearing a mask.

Photo source: Estella

16. What is the least favorite thing about yourself?
I haven’t conducted a poll to find out. My least favorite thing about myself is that I often miss the point of oblique communication. Why can’t people just say what they mean? For example: “I guess I’ll put that” away does not mean “Lee, please put that away.”
17. Who do you miss the most?
I’ll go with Suna on this one: I miss my mom, even though I still talk to her every day. She doesn’t answer back as often as she used to.
18. Do you want everyone to send this back to you?
“I think I speak for everybody here when I say, ‘Huh?’”
19. What color shoes are you wearing?
My feet are nekkid.
20. What was the last thing you ate?
Some mixed vegetables.
21. What are you listening to right now?
Skylight.
22. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
Again, the premise of this question is false, so any answer would be equally false. I’m not a crayon. How could I know what color I would be if I were?
23. Favorite smells?
See! More oblique communication! Does this ask if I have favorite smells? Yes, but I might not. Many people are olfactorily challenged. Or does it ask what those smells are? Fresh coffee and freshly turned fertile earth.
24. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
A time-vampiric, panhandling leech known as a telemarketer.
25. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
Duh!


Sometimes I even fall asleep watching football on TV. I guess I’m just not that much of a sports fan. [Is that one guy trying to pull the receiver’s pants down?]

Photo source: jmtimages

26. Favorite sports to watch?
Another one! If I interpret the stem correctly, football. Then whatever else is on if I’m not doing anything else.
27. Hair Color?
No, this is my natural color.
28. Eye color?
I guess I may have misinterpreted the previous question. Depends on what I’m wearing. It changes.
29. Do you wear contacts?
No.

At this point, the original interrogator got too lazy to write cogent stems, and I grew bored enough with the game to truncate the list. I assume that if I got too bored with my own fascinating opinions to continue, anyone reading this would have fallen asleep by now. [Does that count as sarcasm?] See you next time on the Interminable List of Questions blog. [That surely does.]

Eight Assertions for 08/08/08 @ 08:08

In Dramaclouds, Mother Nature isn’t even mildly perturbed, and she’s scary enough. Still, some rain would be welcome.

Photo by: skooal

With Friday’s Feast still in famine mode, Suna created a meme in honor of the Summer Olympics. It simply lists eight random assertions for 8/8/08. Ideally, I guess I should post it at 08:08, which I have done so (even though I’m actually writing this a couple of days later—Ha!).

1. You can prove anything through numerology if you work hard enough.
2. Books are great friends, but uncomfortable sleeping companions.
3. “I thought that music matters, but that’s bullocks! Music doesn’t matter, not like people matter.”
4. We all learn differently. We all have different skills, goals, and aspirations. Why do schools insist on reducing everyone to the lowest common denominator?
5. All of the problems in the world today can be traced directly back to overpopulation, but the real problem is deciding who has to go.
6. If we don’t deal with overpopulation on our own through birth control, Nature will, and She doesn’t resolve problems kindly.
7. Starvation, epidemic, and ecological collapse will eventually restore balance in Nature. That doesn’t mean humans will survive the process.
8. I don’t wanna play this game any more. Waaaa! But I’ll give bonus points to the first person to cite the quote in #3.