D I V O R C E

Tammy Wynette’s 1967 Album Cover

It’s official. I am divorced. X2B is now X2.

Somehow, it’s very anticlimactic after all of the melodrama getting here. I don’t feel like the song. I’m not depressed or angry, just relieved. I don’t know how X2 feels. She says she’s not angry anymore, but I haven’t wanted to find out. I’m tired of being a verbal punching bag.

Any way, she wasn’t there, not even her lawyer was there. Just my lawyer, the judge, and me. A few simple questions, the judge pounded his gavel, and it was done.

When X2 and I started out 25 years ago, I cast an I Ching. It said there would be a long relationship that ended with a lot of pain. I always thought that the pain would be mine and it would come after the relationship ended. I remember X2 was very angry when she found my I Ching journal, and I quit casting the coins until the relationship was nearly over. There was a lot of pain, but it is what ended the relationship not what came after.

So how do I feel? Sad. Happy. Relieved. Mostly I feel sick with a sinus thing. I went home after and slept for hours. I am going to bed early tonight.

And Suna? She’s sick too. RM has officially moved out. So our first night together without any interference from our prior lives, and we are both taking Niquil and trying to breath. What fun!